The Broken Mirrors

I didn't really like to see my reflections. Other than the fact that I don't like any acne and thinning hair, trying to look good was never really my thing. I never asked to be like this, but nobody cared to get pass that. The more rejection I received, the more I hate to see myself through the mirror. I, then, put a mask of superiority to cover up my true form.

It worked at some point, though some people would tell me that you are different than before. People will rarely see through my mask, my facade, the spectral figure they see as me. I wanted to break anything reflective, cause I just couldn't face the falsehood. All that to disguise the phobia I had all along: fear of my own self. Unlike Narcissus, I despised myself so much. I hate my humanity,  and this dysfunctional mortal vessel. 

At least, that's how I was.

Somehow, reminiscing several lines from pop culture that bring me back to believe in my self reflection. 

"If you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror."

" Kill yourself for recognition. Kill yourself to never ever stop. You broke another mirror, turning into something you're not"

It was tough, and a hard path to take. All those years, denying myself so much, putting on someone else's face. I hated what I had become, so, I destroyed all the mirror so that no living thing shall see my hideous form.

But those who see through my disguise would tell me that I am exhausting myself. And some people inspired me, though indirectly, reshape my idea of self-image. I cared so much about my self-Image, forgetting about the inner self and true self that I had all the time.

I was hollow, detached and now I'm more aware of what I am, and what I can be. I will try to be a little bit like Narcissus, but with a little respect for boundaries between land of truth and pond of fantasy.