Let's put an end to everything

It hurts.

More and more.

And it's getting bigger.

The pain's unbearable.

But none shall know.

They'll just ask me, then leave.
That's how it was for me, being neglected.
Then all the negativity will strike down.

Shall I stay in such state of mind ?
Or will there be any redemption yonside waiting?
Before I tried to put my mindwork behind
 It was too late, and my sanity was crumbling.

Then I retreated, back to the beginning.
Wondering, what's there worthy of me to think ?
These pain will sting like a hornet on it's tantrum.
Piling all it's toxin within my inner sanctum.

Now that my redemption's far behind.
My empty shell will be thing I left behind.
Hollow husk, a larvae made out of sadness.
Witnessing the birth of venomous madness.

Before I took the vow
I should've known that there're things I'd have done

And now, in regret, I'm praying, here sitting all alone.

Should I push the button now?